hello tofu...

So I've decided I'm going to be a vegetarian, and ease my way into vegan-dom. Q watched a PETA DVD we got at the Alkaline show, and I went in for a little bit of it, and saw some pretty horrible things. Things that made me cry. I'm not very tolerant of animal cruelty. It's not just the animals, either - it's the workforce that's treated horribly as well, especially illegal workers. Very sad.

I'm not a die-hard PETA person. But this is the last straw, I think. I've just seen/read too much about how horrible our animals are treated. Literally, it makes me sick. I can't, in good conscience, contribute to this cruelty. I don't care what other people do, but for me, it has to happen. That's not to say I won't eat meat, don't get me wrong. But I will try my absolute hardest to only eat it if I know where it came from. For instance, Q's parents buy their beef from a farmer they know who lives near them, and they know exactly how the cows are raised, and how they are slaughtered. We'll usually go in on that, so I've got beef covered. And my boss gets his pork (that sounds so wrong) from a family near his in-laws, so maybe I can hook something up there.

For now, I'm going to focus on cutting out meat. I'll work on dairy and cheese later. One at a time, folks. I'm telling you, the non-dairy cheese better be good, or I won't be happy. I do love my cheese. I'm going to quit drinking milk right away, though. I thought about it, and it is weird that we, as adults, are drinking the milk of other animals. No other species drinks milk as adults. There are a ton of other ways to get calcium. And dairy cows are treated just as horrible as the rest. Soy milk, here I come!

Anyway, I thought I'd declare this openly, as it will hopefully make it easier to stick to the plan. Tonight will be hard because I'm going to O'Connell's with my parents, and the hamburgers there are delicious. Realistically, though, I just have to think of one of the many horrible images I saw on that video to wipe away the craving. They have delicious salads, too.

Blood Ray, if you're still reading, any good veggie suggestions?

destroying lives to gain ratings

I despise those Dateline shows about sex offenders. Not because I think sex with minors is okay, not at all. I despise them because NBC is obviously using these men to gain ratings. It's vile.

If some 19 year old girl who looks 13 wants to lure men to their homes where cops are waiting to arrest them, fine. What do I care? But why does this need to be on TV? Are other criminals plastered all over TV specials like this (other than COPS, that is)? Why are we only exploiting the sex offenders who have done nothing more (that can be proven, anyway) than chat with a 13 year old online and show up at her house? I don't know if this is true or not, but I heard these men that are caught don't even go to prison, because they can't convict them based on the circumstances. Dateline is basically doing these shows to destroy these people. Who is Dateline to do that? It's the job of law enforcement to take care of criminals, not Dateline.

I'm not defending these people. I think the whole thing is disgusting and wrong, and think that these men need help in the worst way. There's obviously something wrong with them. Most know they know they have a problem, and will admit they need help.

I guess it's the same way I feel about the sex offender list. If these men (and women, I guess) have done their time as dictated by our justice system (cough), why are they on a list? Why aren't murderers on this list too, or other criminals? Is it worse to live next door to a sex offender, or a murderer? Wouldn't you want to know about both?

If there's something wrong with our justice system (again, cough), and these folks aren't being kept in prison long enough (or, god forbid rehabilitated), then let's fix that, not put out lists for all to see. It's ridiculous.

Plus, what if someone is wrongly convicted? It wouldn't be the first time, that's for sure. Then their name and reputation have been compromised for life. I know someone in this situation. He was in college, and a girl accused him of rape. He claims it didn't happen that way at all, but was found guilty anyway, and now, though he has a wife, kids, and a house in the suburbs, his name is forever etched on that list. He's a good guy, one that takes care of his family and is a great father, but because of this is so limited in terms of jobs, and everything else - and constantly gets dirty looks and threats from neighbors.

I guess it all boils down to this - until we can have a system that works (I'll even settle for most of the time), it's not right to do this to people. Same with the death penalty. If there's even a slight chance someone isn't guilty, how can we say it's okay to kill them? If our system allows innocent people to be wrongly convicted (and the guilty to run free), we can't have a death penalty, and we shouldn't have a list.

Just my humble opinion. Blast me if you want - I've thought long and hard about this, and can't shake the feeling that these shows are wrong, no matter how hard I try to convince myself otherwise. I know kids are being hurt, abused, raped, etc. - I don't know how to solve this problem, but I'm pretty sure a couple of Datelines isn't going to do it.

thoughts about gas

I don't really care about gas prices one way or the other, as long as everything is fair. Yes, it sucks to pay $40 to fill up my car's tank, but that's life. I choose to have a car, so I have to suffer the consequences. I'm just glad I didn't buy a big ol' honking SUV. I'd be more poor than I am now.

What I do hate, though is reading about big oil's massive profits. Especially when we're helping to finance these profits through all of the tax breaks and write-offs they're given to do such things as research and development. Why should we have to pay for their research when they're making billions per year in profit? That's insane. That's what pisses me off when I'm shelling out $40 to fill my tank.

I've heard some talk about a conspiracy theory involving big oil and alternative fuel production. Supposedly the big oil companies have shelled (no pun intended of course) out huge sums of money (lord knows they have it) to buy up all the patents existing for everything related to alternative fuel. I'm always interested in conspiracy theories, mostly for entertainment, but this one somehow sits differently. Would anyone doubt they would do this? I don't doubt it at all. Surely we have the brains and resources to make alternative fuel a reality. Come to think of it, how can anyone think we don't have it?

It's interesting, that's all I'm saying...

i have way too much free time

I stumbled upon this site today (in my ridiculous amount of free time at work). It's a site where you can register email addresses of your friends so they'll receive a letter from you after you're gone (assuming you're a believer, anyway), taken to heaven with the rapture. It's hilarious. Here's the actual letter emailed to your friends the first Friday after and every Friday after that:


Dear Friend:

This message has been sent to you by a friend or a relative who has recently disappeared along with millions and millions of people around the world.

The reason they chose to send you this letter is because they cared about you and would like you to know the truth about where they went.

This may come as a shock to you, but the one who sent you this has been taken up to heaven.

If you read a Bible, you will see that after chapter three in the book of Revelation, the church is no longer mentioned as being on earth. (The church are the believers in Jesus Christ, not the buildings in which people meet.)

In the Bible, 1 Thessalonians Chapter 4 verses 16 and 17 tell how Jesus came to take away His church. But, you have to believe the Bible is the Word of God in order to believe this.

I am sure that there will be a lot of speculation as to what happened to all these people. The theories of some scientists and world leaders will have so much credibility that most of the world will believe them.

It will sound like the truth!

But, there is only one truth. And, that truth is that Jesus Christ, God in the flesh, came back to earth and took with Him to Heaven all who believed in Him and made Him their Lord.

If you would like to give your life to Jesus Christ and be born again, it is not too late. First you must pray to God saying "Father I admit I am a sinner, and I will turn from my sin and do good. I believe that Jesus was your son and that He came here to die for me so that my sins would be forgiven. I ask you to forgive me and I will repent of my sins. In Jesus name I pray."

If you just prayed that prayer and meant it with all your heart, then God will know you as one of His own. You should now seek out others who have also given their lives to Christ, read a Bible daily, and do your best to bring others to Christ.

God bless you.


If I'm left to rot here on Earth after the rapture, you can bet your ass I'm not going to start praying then. What's the point? Honestly, I can only imagine what kind of mail the people you sign up are going to get. Come to think of it, I think I'll gather the addresses of my enemies and put them on here. You better be nice to me!

sweet jesus help us, the 80s are back

Last night Q and I went to see Alkaline Trio at the Pageant. As usual, it was a great show. I've never been disappointed with seeing them live. Not only do they sound awesome live, but they apparently hate smoke, so they request that people not smoke at their shows. When we saw them at Pop's, no one paid any attention to the request, which is expected, I guess. But the Pageant actually enforced the request, and set up a special area for smoking. It was great. Not that I have a problem with smoking, not at all. However, the smoke is usually so bad at concerts that I come home smelling to high heaven. That's gross. The last thing I want to do is come home at 11:30 on a work night and have to shower before sleepytime because every inch of my body reeks. I actually saw people smoking, too, even after ushers had told them to quit (we were sitting upstairs in the old people section). I just don't get it. If the band you paid $15 or $19 to come and see asks you to refrain from smoking, have some respect and do it. If you can't wait 2 hours at the most to have a smoke, you've got a big problem. Just get over it.

Plus, Tammy, the woman who spearheads the West Memphis 3 World Awareness Day apparently got the Trio to talk about the events in St. Louis (at the Hi Pointe & Lemmons on June 3) and a little bit about the case. They have a song on their latest album about the three (called 'Prevent This Tragedy'), so I'm sure it wasn't a tough sell. I've heard them talk about the case at shows before. I think it's really cool that they do that. The place was sold out I'm pretty sure, so what better way to tell 2000 people about the events? I haven't seen even a mention of them anywhere in the media here, so might as well do this.

It's always entertaining, though, to people watch at these shows - all the little high school kids and the new fashion. Seems like it's turning more and more towards the 80s - a time period which does not, in my opinion, ever need to be repeated. Anyway, there were lots of leggings (under skirts of course), peg leg jeans, crazy colored poofy hair, and cut up t-shirts. Not a good look. I see nothing attractive in this, and will refuse to cave in to these trends. It seems like I say this every year with the new trends, then cave anyway (capris, pointy-toed shoes), but this time I mean it. Never again will I don leggings, unitards, peg leg jeans, tightrolls, t-shirt clips, or any of that crap. No way. It's wrong on so very many levels. Hopefully these trends will be confined to the jr. high/high school crowd, like the stupid lug boots the kids wore (or whatever they're called) with skirts and whatnot. Those are the goofiest looking things.

I guess anything is better than the 90s, though - no one ever again should wear the MC Hammer Z Cavariccis. There's just no call for that type of humiliation and cruelty. Please, Hammer, don't hurt 'em [us ever again with your presence]. U can't [shouldn't ever] touch this [pair of pants ever again].

baseball and homemade t-shirts

We went to KC this past weekend to see this cutie pie (and some other friends too):

He's a great baby - very laid back and adorable. It was neat-o to hold him and cuddle with him.

We also went to the Royals game. I thought it was pretty cool that you could wake up one day and decide to go to a baseball game - there is no such thing here in St. Louis, especially now with the new stadium. We got $12 tickets, and sat literally two rows from the field in the right outfield. Also something you can't do in St. Louis. I know, it's the price you pay for having a great team (though a little shaky, for sure, this year so far).

They played the Indians, and killed them 11-5. We had a blast, and I couldn't help but notice the shocking differences between the fans in KC and in St. Louis. In St. Louis, the fans are an older bunch, for the most part. Lots of thirties and forties. And lots of family action. And the younger folk who are there are well-behaved, for the most part. I'm not saying you don't get a rowdy bunch of friends, that most definitely happens. But it's so tame compared to KC.

In KC, it seems like teens go here for fun, as opposed to movie theaters or malls like in St. Louis (the ticket prices are comparable - scary). The crowd was considerably younger. In fact, we were surrounded by a large group of what I thought were preteens, but my friend assured me they were in high school, without a parent in sight. They get younger and younger, I tell you. Anyway, some interesting highlights from the game:

-We saw a rather large guy break a seat. One side of it cracked, so he decided to stomp the other side and break it off all together, so he could give it to a guy he almost got in a fist fight with earlier. The large guy called some girl they were with underage - this girl, whether underage or not, was horribly drunk, and had on barely any clothing. I'm a fan of miniskirts, but this girl had a scarf around her waist, I'm pretty sure. She also almost spilled beer (and her breasts) onto my friends 11 year old son - a real class act for sure.

-There was a guy in front of us wearing a homemade t-shirt (by homemade I mean white hanes T and black sharpie). I had gone to get a beer, and when I got back, my friend told me to look at it. Because he was sitting down, all I could see was 'Indians, if you are reading this...take it as a warning...' She made me wait for the rest until he stood up. It said, under the first two lines, 'I'm going to shit on your face.' I almost fell out of my chair laughing. He eventually got kicked out. Nothing like a good ol' homemade t-shirt.

Another cool thing about KC's stadium is that it's universal parking all around, so you pay $9 and park with everyone else surrounding the stadium. There's plenty of room to grill, drink, play catch, and all sorts of cool stuff. I like that so much better than the system here, though we don't really have a choice, since it's smack in downtown. I had a great time at the KC game, though. It's just so interesting to note the vast differences.

On a side note, all of the kickball teams had to nominate their all-stars yesterday (one guy and one girl from each team play in the 2 all-star games on the Saturday before the tourney), and I got voted the girl all-star for my team. Pretty exciting! Plus, we won both of our games, one against a team that was tied with us in our division - we beat them 17-3! It's so much more fun to win than to lose, even if I am super sore today from running around the bases so many times.

can I get a 'gullible' over here?

Beware the door-to-door free breast exam guy

This was one of the headlines on msnbc.com today. I had to click on it - surely it couldn't be as simple as that. Sometimes these 'news' outlets get creative, just to make you click on the link. This had to be one of these times.

Nope. A 76 year old man was arrested after two women accused him of coming to their house to offer free breast exams. He subsequently asked them to take off their clothes and did a 'girly' exam with no gloves. I guess that's when the women got suspicious.

First of all, EW. Second, the EW moment should never have been reached. Seriously. These women were in their thirties, they weren't feeble, old women. What kind of woman lets a 76 year old man into their house for a free breast exam? If you ask me, they deserved what they got. Give me a break. So the guy said he was a doctor. They believed that? The guy was probably completely shocked to even get past the front door.

I can't help thinking of myself in this situation. An old guy knocks on the door with a black bag, says he's with the local hospital, and is offering free door-to-door breast exams. I'm 200% confident I'd say 'No thanks,' close the door, and move on about my life, laughing over the possibility of a good blog entry, or a good story to tell my friends. Even if he could prove he was a doctor, no fucking way is this guy coming into my house. Even if I had a brain malfunction and let him in for the breast exam, no way am I taking off my clothes for the 'girlie' exam. No way in hell.

Is a warning like this even necessary? I guess so. I'm still dumbfounded about it. How? Why? Wow.

take these books and shove 'em

Thanks to Mustang Betsy for this link:

http://www.paperlesspetition.org/

If you are tired of getting new phone book after new phone book after new phone book, click on this link. They're trying to make it something you ask for as opposed to getting it no matter what.

It makes sense, really. In today's age of the internet, who even uses phone books anymore? The last time I tried to use the yellow pages to look for something, I couldn't find it for the life of me because they use some backwards way to organize everything. It was a nightmare. And imagine the sheer amount of trees necessary to produce these things. It's ridiculous!

Taken from msnbc.com:

U.S. NEWS
CRIME SECURITY MORE
• WP: White House in survival mode?
• Pomp and protest at White House
• Protester disrupts Hu at White House
• Americans fleeing nation's big cities
• Lawmaker apologizes over obscenity

U.S. POLITICS HARDBALL FIRST READ
• WP: White House in survival mode?
• Pomp and protest at White House
• Protester disrupts Hu at White House
• Lawmaker apologizes over obscenity
• Rove shifts role, McClellan quits

WORLD NEWS
IRAQ TERRORISM MORE
• Pomp and protest at White House
• Al-Jaafari clears way to be replaced
• WP: Iraq war costs still climbing
• Nepal protests turn deadly
• Suspected al-Qaida fighter killed

Honestly, does that story need to be in all three sections? Does this bother anyone but me? The world news section is the worst. Usually there's more US news there than anything else. Come on, NBC - there's already two sections for US news. Can't the world news focus on - cough - THE REST OF THE WORLD? It's sickening.

google is marvelous

My writing group will get a kick out of this one. We have a shared blog where we post our daily exercises (which we've been really bad about doing lately, myself included). It doesn't get many hits, but somehow ends up smeared all over the search engines. I guess writing fiction means including a bunch of words that wouldn't normally appear in nonfiction. Below are a few of the ways people have found the site:

luggage rental in stl

sexy no shirted bikini

make your own sound proof studio

new york studio school painting marathon

how to make terry towel wraparound

electric scooter charging cords

xanga streetcar crowded

collared greens recipe

sex mom with wearing silk skirt

mitzi mexican clothing

wet snow

forest park houses stl

mr grind picture photo

fuck a woman tonight in st.louis

mane face expression painting

madsen grocery

east saint louis dress shops

antibacterial shower soap smell bad

ralphie's grocery stores

defrisco

learning games trailing cover wagon games

set garage sale

architectural digest dude ranch

grim reaper saint

second hand furniture stores, saint louis

toto too store minnesota (toto - he's everywhere!)

laughing gives her hiccups

Of course, my favorites are the ones with no regard whatsoever to grammer, such as 'sex mom with wearing silk skirt'. What was that person possibly looking for? I also liked 'architectural digest dude ranch'. I guess those are in that magazine...I'm not a regular reader. Seems kind of odd, though. I also get a kick out of 'sexy no shirted bikini'. What exactly is a no shirted bikini? And I'm definitely searching for 'grim reaper saint', as I'm fascinated with the grim reaper, and am curious to see what this might bring up.

I just love this little glimpse into humanity. I do like to stay on top of what the kids are searching for these days.

a major plea for help

As most of you know, I'm a staunch supporter of the West Memphis Three - three teenagers (at the time) who were convicted of murdering three young boys back in the mid '90s, in a trial I compare to a serious witch hunt. The trial was so shady it's hard to imagine these guys ever got convicted, much less for life (and death, for one). Jason, the one who wrote the letter below, has determinedly maintained his innocence the entire time, and was basically convicted because he was tried with another of the guys, the more 'controversial' one, Damian (I type that while laughing - what teenager isn't 'controversial'?). If there is a shred of evidence against any of them, none whatsoever points to Jason.

If you have a few minutes, I encourage you to write a letter. It's a few minutes of your time, but it might mean a lifetime of freedom for guys who have been behind bars for far too long as it is. Go to www.wm3.org for more details on the case.

From: Burk Sauls
Subject: [WM3] PLEASE READ this letter from Jason
Date: Tue, 18 Apr 2006 15:07:53 -0700

For those of you who haven't seen this, here's a letter from Jason Baldwin. Jason sent it to Mara Leveritt who passed it along to us, and asked that we distribute it far and wide. I think it's a great way to get the governor to notice the letters, and maybe this idea will generate something aside from those "rubber-stamped form letters."

This is a good way for folks in Arkansas to speak up, too. If you live in Arkansas, you should definitely write a letter. We need to show the "power" that this case isn't going away.

- Burk Sauls
2:50 PM Pacific
Tuesday, April 18, 2006 CE

------------------------------------------------------------

April 11, 2006

Dear Supporters of the WM3:

A friend and I were chatting this weekend when she brought up an important issue. With Awareness Day fast approaching, what is being planned for Arkansas? After all, this state needs to be everyone's focal point. She proposed a brilliant idea, which I want to pass on to you. I know many of you over the past decade or so have literally inundated the Governor's office with letters. How many letters have been sent? Well, it could be anyone's guess. I don't believe anyone is keeping a record, and of course, the Governor's office keeps an apparently endless supply of those rubber-stamped 'form' letters everyone receives in response.

So the idea is this: We all write another letter to the Governor of Arkansas - but wait! This time, instead of mailing these letters directly to his office, we address them to the post office box listed below, like this:

WRITE TO FREEDOM
Attn: Gov. Mike Huckabee
P.O. Box 7406
Little Rock, AR 72217

How does it sound so far? (By the way, I came up with the name of this little mission - 'WRITE TO FREEDOM.' It has a nice ring, doesn't it?) The letters need to be brief, polite and focused. Gov. Huckabee says he hasn't seen proof of our innocence. Is he satisfied with the 'proof' of our guilt? Tell him what fact of this case troubles you most. Stress how important it is for him to be well informed. And don't wait. There isn't much time. Please write that letter today!

All letters must be in by Friday, May 26. As they arrive, Arkansas volunteers will sort them as follows: Letters from Arkansans, Letters from Other Americans, and, last but not least, Letters from Humanity around the Globe.

As Awareness Day approaches, I expect this cache of letters to grow exponentially. In other words, I'm hoping we'll need lots of supporters here in Arkansas just to carry them to our great state's capitol. As the date for that event draws near, supporters here in Arkansas will post details for anyone - from anywhere - who wants to participate.

If all goes well, local and national media will also be on hand. That's why I want you to do this too: On the outside of your envelope, write a brief statement about what you told the governor and what you hope he does concerning the case of the West Memphis Three. That way, these statements can be made available to the media, without opening the Governor's mail.

I believe the Arkansas Constitution grants power to the Governor to help people who have been wrongly convicted. But for him to do that in this case, he needs to know the facts. Certainly, once he does, justice will not be ignored forever.

Thank you, everyone. Today is my birthday and I have but one wish. This is the last year of my twenties. I'll be happy indeed if Damien, Jessie and I can spend just one day of it as free men.

Always,
Jason

those were the days

The other day I was putting my fridge pack of Coke Zero into the fridge, after wrestling with the stupid part that's supposed to punch out neatly, allowing the Cokes to stay in the cube and chill while taking up only a little bit of your fridge. That's the goal, anyway. However, every time I open the damn thing the package splits somehow, or I get a massive paper cut. It's such a pain.

I noticed there was a contest going on, so I made sure to look at the piece I had just mangled off the cube and saw some stupid internet access code thingy. Remember the good ol' days when you could twist the top off of a 20 oz soda and see immediately if you won or not? I drank free soda all throughout college thanks to those contests (and my leftover meal plan points that got us free 12 packs). That was exciting - twisting it off, the anticipation of the win building in your gut. How fucking exciting is it to take the stupid cap (or mangled box) to your computer, go to the website, type all that crap in, and most likely lose? It's ridiculous.

I vote to go back to the good ol' days of instantaneous prize offering. I thought this society was leaning more and more towards everything and it's brother being instantaneous? Why is this going backwards? I guess so people will be forced to visit a website and sign up for more spam mail. How companies make money on spam mail I'll never understand. Who actually reads that crap, or even opens it? Thank god for junk mail filters, that's all I can say.

crappy cold

Here's a pic of the totally adorable baby boy I don't get to visit this weekend in KC because stinky Q is sick. I got him sick, though, so I take responsibility. I better be able to get my hands on him next weekend!

tomkat = an alien???

Dear lord, what is this woman carrying? Maybe it's an alien. Not so far off, if you consider the father...maybe she was impregnated by the illustrious Xenu of Scientology fame. Now that'd be some interesting stuff, while also proving his existance. A win-win for Scientology, in my opinion.

Supposedly there's rumors she's having twins. Given the size of her stomach, that's also not so far off. She's not a big girl - the exact opposite, actually - so I can't imagine why else she'd be that huge. I've seen pregnant people, folks, and they're not usually this godawful big.

On a side note, I got to go and see David Sedaris read last night with Moo at Powell Symphony Hall. It was a blast. He read a couple of new stories, and we laughed the entire time. In fact, at one point, I was almost in tears. If you haven't read any of his stories, I highly recommend them. They're totally hilarious, while being completely wrong at the same time. Definitely my kind of humor.

The best story, I thought, was one all about cursing and sex, basically. I thought it was even funnier that there were a handful of children in the audience. Nothing better than a guy who curses left and right and talks about kinky sex with no regard to children. I loved it!

death metal...ha

Q and I went to see the Eagles of Death Metal play an in-store show at Vintage Vinyl on Saturday. They played for a half hour, and it was awesome. They are totally full of energy (even though they're bordering on old), and really played well. That's my perfect kind of show - get there, find a place to stand, the band you came to see plays for a little bit, and it's over. There aren't three crappy bands playing first that you have to sit through because you want a good spot, and the set is short and sweet.

There were, however, more turds packed into that place than I've seen in a while. There were a couple of really bad mohawks, as though the person rolled out of bed and did nothing to it. In my opinion, if you're going to shave your head into a mohawk, at least make the commitment to make it look good all the time. It looks really dumb just laying there. There were also a lot of kids, making really dumb comments. For example, there was a group down the aisle behind us (we were packed in all around the rock CDs), and one of the kids said 'They're name doesn't really represent the kind of music they play.' Another kid with him said 'That's kind of the point.' Duh. I bet that guy felt like a dumbass. Seriously. Would a death metal band put 'death metal' in their name?

Being at the loop always makes me feel old, though, what with all of those Wash U kids running around. Makes me nostalgic for the good ol' college days, that's for sure. One of these days I'm going to get enough balls to go to the Scientology church down there and see how freaky they really are. A guy I know went there, watched the 'movie', then when they wanted to try and recruit him, he totally bailed on them, without giving as much as his name. Nice. I so want to do that. But believe me, don't get suckered into giving your name - they'll track you down and bother you for years - or so I've heard. I wouldn't risk it.

yes, give the freak what he wants...

What's up with everyone calling for the death of Zacarias Moussaoui? The guy obviously wants to die, from the way he's acting during his trial. Why give him what he wants? I say let the guy rot in prison for the rest of his life. I'm confident the torture inflicted upon him from fellow inmates will be much, much worse than putting him to death. Heck, the inmates may even kill him themselves, then everyone'd be happy.

And no arguing that it'd be cheaper to kill him than keep him in prison for the rest of his life - that's just a big farce.

Just another reason I'll never be chosen for a trial involving the death penalty.

grab your bibles!

Disney World? Epcot? The beach? Hell no. It's the Holy Land Experience!

the new digs

Q and I got to go to the first game ever at the new Busch Stadium last night. It was an exhibition game between two of the Cardinals' minor league teams - Memphis and Springfield. We had a great time. The stadium is really cool, and really has a different feel. It's obvious from the seats, as the park is no longer round - pretty weird. It was hard to get used to the new scoreboard, and the way they displayed the retired numbers was kind of odd, much less emphasis than in the old stadium. The other areas are weird too, as you can see the city from just about anywhere. You were pretty closed in at the old stadium, so that's different. It's kind of surreal. Q thinks if you have a good throw you could reach the highway from one of the sides of the stadium - it's scary how close it is to 40. I'll have to figure out where Father Time stands at the new place - that guy cracks me up.

The one thing that really sucked was the concessions. The lines were out of control, with many of the hot dog/beer stands only having one register. We waited in line forever, and unlike the old stadium, there weren't any TVs broadcasting the game. Maybe they just weren't installed yet, as there was a lot of things that weren't finished yet (like the section numbers - Q and I ended up sitting in the wrong one for much of the game). I hope that's the case. If I'm going to have to wait in a long line for a freaking $5.25 hot dog, I better at least be able to see the game.

Afterwards we met up with a friend and headed over to Paddy O's. I happened to run into my boss there, which was funny, since neither of us knew the other was going to the game. Eventually we made our way outside, where there was a DJ, and a few people dancing. There was this one black guy who danced to everything. He was the type of guy who couldn't help but dance when the music was on. He was so into it, with the hugest smile on his face. I ended up dancing with some old guys, which was funny. The DJ started calling out celebrity look-alikes (I say this with a grain of salt - none actually looked like their celebrity) to go to the bar for a free shot. Q's celebrity was Jack Osbourne, because of his black frame glasses, which he was none too happy about, until he got the free shot, anyway. Then he called some random black guy Nelly, and the only thing they had in common was that they were black. Then he called an Asian guy Brad Pitt - you see the similarity, right??? It was actually pretty funny. I think our friend said the DJ was the guy who does the door contest at the baseball games - the one where a person has to choose from three doors, then can trade it in to choose again, etc. I might have imagined that, though. Who knows.

A good time was had by all. I'm so ready for the baseball season. I like it more and more every year - Q's influence, I'm sure. He's a fanatic. Apparently Albert's already hit a homer out of the park (during practice) - should be a great season. Go Cards!

i've always wanted one of these...

Wow, this is a great deal. Do you need a maid? One who will work for free? Then this is for you! This man will clean for free, preferably for women. He calls himself a french maid, and will wear whatever you want him to wear (including, but not limited to, heels, panties, and lingerie, and of course, the traditional french maid outfit), while cleaning your house with your own supplies. Good deal, right?

All he asks in return is the occasional reassuring pat on the bottom (and the occasional paid roll in the sack, but that's my own interpretation...take from this what you will).

Pretty creative whoring, huh?